Victory

About 2 weeks ago my snow shovel disappeared from where I kept it on the patio. It was a good shovel with a fancy green auxiliary handle. I bought the shovel about 3 years ago and got a decent amount of use out of it before someone walked off with it. I was a bit annoyed by it's disappearance. I mean let's not mince words here... someone stole my fuckin shovel. I did a quick walk around the neighboring units to mine and the shovel was nowhere to be found at the time. I get it. I live in Coram. People are fuckin scoundrels and hoodlums in general. No biggie. Winters almost over. Fuck it. I'll buy a new shovel next year for the new house. No need to trip.

Last night, in preparation for more snow, I parked in a different place than usual. This allows the plows an easier time clearing the streets and allows me easier access to all side of the truck for snow removal. I don't normally park in this lot so I had to take a different path to and from my unit. This morning, as I'm walking to the truck I'm stopped dead in my tracks... my shovel is on someone's patio. That mother fucker. This guy / gal has my fuckin shovel on display next to his door like it's his shit. Nah, son. Not happening. So I walk up to the door, grab my shovel, knock on the window and some woman looks out at me, I raise my shovel over my head like it's the fuckin Lombardi trophy and walk off with it.

Post Script: After further examination the shovel isn't in great shape. The person who stole it really banged up the shovel part trying to break up ice (I'm guessing). However, the fancy green auxiliary handle thingy is in perfect condition so I'll salvage that.